Promoting God and Kindness At Home

 

  Our kids are constantly bombarded by the world. They bring those mindsets home every day. Most of the time they aren't healthy for their emotional well being. I've noticed that in my own kids that it's a constant battle for us to keep them in a positive mindset. So I set up a system that I'm going to share with you. You can take this and make one that will fit the needs of your own children.

 How To Make It Work For You

First I suggest figuring out what you can afford to do, what you want to accomplish, and what you want your kids to work on. My kids needed encouragement to basically be a good people. Where do you go for instructions on how to be a good person? The bible. So I decided to take Philippians 4:8 to heart. I wanted us to think on all the good things. 

What You Will Need 

 Journal/notebook

Jars

Coins/Rocks/Marbles

Affirmations

Kindness Bank Worksheet

 

What is a Kindness Bank Worksheet?

This is where your going to put in all the things that you think will benefit your kids. Things that you can maintain at home. The one below is one that I have set up for my own children. If you can't tell my kids need to work on thinking of others, saying kind things to others and about themselves and doing new things and doing things that get them moving. I typed this up one afternoon and have revised it off and on. Then bought a cheap frame and hung it on the wall, with the affirmations, where they could read it whenever they needed to.

 

 

Kindness Bank

• Read a bible chapter, 3 coins each
• Chores without argument, 2 coins per day
• Ask others if you can get something for them when you get something for yourself 1 coin per day
• Compliment someone 1 coin per day
• Read Affirmations out loud 1 coin per day
• Help or Make meal for others 1 coin
• Run 1 lap around the house 2 coin per day
• Write in your journal 1 coin per day
• Write one line from Proverbs in your journal, 1 coin per day
• Write 5 things your thankful for in your journal, something different each day 1 coin
• Try something new in front of mom or dad, 2 coins up to 3 times a day
• Do something helpful without being asked 1 coin per day
• Complete 1 pages of bible puzzles or color pages for a coin up to 3 times a day
• Superbook quest, 1 coin per day
  
• Cursing, -2 coins per word
• Saying bad things about yourself or others, -3 coins each time
• Falsely accuse others, -10 coins
• Being violent (hurting others, throwing, slamming or kicking things),-5 coins
• Lying, -5 coins
• whiny voice, -2 coins
• Ask for something without a please, -1 coin

Everyone gets to keep the coins that they earned at the end of the month. 

Small trip and prize at the end of the month for those that earn this month's goal.

 

The Why Behind The Setup Of This Kindness Bank

1. A Place for Jesus

This is something that I think will help the kids more than anything else. As parents. We get busy. We mess up. We miss things.  If they have Jesus and the bible to go to. If they could get use to prayer and the bible as a safe place. That if they have a problem they can go to these things to find answers. How can we not give them these things to help them?

2.Affirmations

Affirmations are kind of like teaching them to be able to encourage themselves. To find the good in themselves even on the days they feel the worst. Look for the good. So I found some affirmations to print out and hang on the wall. I don't have the links for these but I suggest that you find ones that your child can read on their own and are in big writing so even if they don't read them aloud, they are noticeable. My children are older and I put these right above their computer or where they work on homework. 

3. Keep Track

The kids need to be able to keep track of how well they are doing. We used pennies. I let them start with 50 pennies so that if mistakes happen in the beginning, then they still had more chances. I also made it extremely easy for them to earn them back. Doing pennies also gave them a chance to have a sort of allowance. Something to hold in their hand at the end of the month.

4. Accessible

Everything was where they could work on it whenever they wanted. Even the change was right where they could get to it to put their own coins in their bank. This is where I'm telling them I'm trusting them to be honest. Giving them a chance to prove we can some day trust them with more responsibilities. Losing some coins now and them learning it's not ok to steal or lie. Is better than them learning over something bigger and more upsetting later.

5. Parents

The lasting goal isn't for them to expect something for being good or doing these things. The lasting goal is that they decide on their own that these are things they like to do. These are things that make them feel good. That it is nice to help others and it makes things better at home when we use these things in our daily life. It wont happen overnight. We are changing habits, they will fight it. It will probably be a battle. But if we make these a choice for them. Let them know that these are choices that they need to make. That these changes of habit will make life better for everyone and the rewards are worth the work.

6. Reward

Lets just say my first reward system failed. I'd made it a competition, which did make them move faster but also pitted the kids against each other. Not a good thing so that changed. Then I realized that my trip and prize reward was to expensive for me to maintain. So I decided that these trips would be something in my budget. Like packing a cooler of food and going to a new park or a place free for us to visit. It's not about how much you spend on them it's about your time with them. By the end of the month they really do deserve an extra nice day even if all they did was adjust to these new ways of thinking. It's hard to change habits.

7. Family Effort

If you can, try to be an influence and show that you are doing these things too. I made the little banks for everyone in the family even though it was just three of us doing it. I told the kids that I don't need to have a bank because these things are just what I do. But they weren't convinced. So for a little while we had a notebook and we would write down what we did on the list with how much we earned each day. I would add to my bank too. So they could see what mom was getting too. Sometimes they are so busy they can't see what mom actually does and this was a bit of an "Oh!" thing for them. 

8. Journal

This is something that I've encouraged quite a bit. The kids need a safe place to complain, express emotions and tell about their day. So these are just for them. The only thing they show me are the things they want to share or to show that they did write things that they are thankful for. To make it a bit more interesting I encouraged them have different color writing utensil to write with for different emotions. This is to teach them to identify what they are feeling during their day.

 9. Superbook

This is a phone app that has games and puzzles that can help learn bible verses and entertain them. I put it on there so that if we are somewhere like in a waiting room they can still earn coins.

 Free For You

Here is what I've tried to get a pdf or something made so that you can fill it in however you would like. Unfortunately all my efforts have not worked so you should be able to copy and paste what is provided below with my complete permission.

Kindness Bank

• Read a bible chapter,________________ per_______________
• Chores without argument, ______________ per ______________
• Ask others if you can get something for them when you get something for yourself, ______________ per _______________
• Compliment someone, _______________per_______________
• Read Affirmations out loud, _______________per______________
• Help or Make meal for others, ______________per______________
• Run 1 lap around the house, _______________ per ______________
• Write in your journal, _________________per ________________
• Write one line from Proverbs in your journal, _____________per ___________
• Write 5 things your thankful for in your journal, something different, _________________per_____________
• Try something new in front of mom or dad, ______________per______________
• Do something helpful without being asked, ______________per_____________
• Complete 1 pages of bible puzzles or color page, ______________per_______________
• Superbook quest, ____________per_______________
• Cursing, _____________________
• Saying bad things about yourself or others, _____________________
• Falsely accuse others, ____________________
• Being violent (hurting others, throwing, slamming or kicking things)__________________________
• Lying, _____________________
• whiny voice,___________________
• Ask for something without a please, _______________________

Thank You my friend for viewing my blog today and I Pray this helps you,

Dee

Getting out of Depression

It's always about forcing yourself to make the first move. My first move was opening my bible instead of my phone. It did make me want to fall asleep for a while. It's like all our demons see it and fight as soon as you open it up. I'll tell you some days I only got through a couple verses before my mind wondered. That was okay. As soon as I could, I'd try again. I'd journal everything through my ups and downs.

Gradually I would stay away from things that I would normally us as an escape. For me it was romance novels, manga and social media. Putting these things down hurt a lot. What do you fill your time with when you cut out these things? The bible. So I read more. Read longer each day. Learned more each day.

I prayed a lot. I prayed for myself, my family, the people I knew. That is when all the bad things felt like they wanted to suffocate me. I was so tired of all the lies around me in the media and I asked God to show me the truth. Asked Him to help me to be able to identify the lies. I was to that point that I felt like I just couldn't stand this world for another moment. I'd hit bottom. I was overwhelmed by all the things I couldn't fix, overwhelmed by all the problems I caused my family during my time in my depression. I could see what my mental absents had done and didn't even know where to start to fix it. I was down on myself to the point I wanted to just go back to bed and do what I'd been doing before. I knew that I couldn't. I couldn't give up. So first I cried, then prayed and cried some more.

That's when I asked him to be with me always, in all ways. I again told Him that I believed that Jesus died for my sins on the cross and rose again three days later. I told Him that I needed Him to be in charge of my life. From that day forward I totally depended on Him to get me through every day. I started to see God's actions in the bible as a father not just an all knowing being. I saw Jesus as a person that struggled just like me. He got annoyed, cried and loved those around him. I saw the Holy Spirit as my best friend who I told everything to and depended on to show me the right paths. 

Things then started to change. The Lord would put in front of me exactly what I needed to hear or see. He would cause me to not feel hungry all the time and I started to lose weight. I felt the need to clear out things that I never realized were weighing me down until they were gone. They might have been consided idols in God's eyes. I stopped watching tv shows or movies. I stopped listening to any radio station that wasn't christian. They are gone and I feel like God has given me peace since they went out the door. I started to feel more confident and felt lead to go to a church. For a while I was just sitting in the back with the two younger kids. I wouldn't talk to anyone but I felt like it was filling a whole in me. So I tried out their bible study. Once again it filled a part that was empty. 

It's been like that a lot. I'd feel like there was an empty part of me and God would fill it. When I started to worry about something I'd give it to God and suddenly somehow it would be taken care of. I started to forgive people. Not forgive and forget but forgive in my heart so that I can move on. Funny thing is I never realized before that I was holding anything against them. God has a way of digging those things out of you, so that you can process and deal with them in a healthy way.  It's been a slow process and difficult at times. As God had lead me to do and say things that I never would have before. He has shown the people around me in a different light. He has shown me, my actions, pointed out my faults. I'm a work in progress. Habits are hard to break.

Now I try to see what I'm doing and change. I work on things to improve myself. I'm telling you all this because I feel God has lead me to share my struggles with you. It's been months into this life that God has made new for me. 

So why would I be blogging and doing things online if God had me cut out all of those other things? I believe that it's a part of the path he will use to move me forward. Or more likely to help someone else because that is how He works. He will work through me to help someone else. So that they can see that God wants more for them and has so much to give, if they would only ask.  

For those that are going through this process with God. It's not going to be easy as you work through things. But it will be worth it. Keep your bible beside you, read it first thing in the morning, listen to christian music, take time to feel his presents with you. You are not alone. Being loved means that you will be corrected sometimes but it's all for making you the best version of yourself. 

My prayers that God is with you and blesses you my friend,

Dee

 

10 Steps To Abundance

 

This is something that I've been working on for a long time. It's taken a long time to realize that I already have an abundant life. I just wasn't seeing it. But some things have changed since I started my search to find it. Here is my top 10.

1. Find God - Yes, God has everything to do with abundant life. The best way to find this out is to read the bible and I don't mean just on Sunday's. This is every day before you start your day. You can't really appreciate what you have unless you are thanking the giver for the things that you have. 

2. Earn it- If you are given everything in life you wont feel any kind appreciation for it. Are you seeing this? Yes, you have to appreciate what you have!

3. Take care of what you have now- God wont give you more to take care of if you don't take care of what he as given you. That includes yourself. If you don't take care of yourself how will you be able to care for more than yourself. So taking care of your own health and well being is a start and then grow from there.

4. Learn- Learn more about yourself and why you do what you do. Learn more about the things and people in your life. Learn to do more things. 

5. Be present- Pay attention to the people and things around you. I know this one is really hard. We are programmed now to be on devices but what really matters isn't there. You would be surprised all that you might miss if you aren't paying attention.

6. Ask Questions- Many might say that they are introverted or whatever so they can't talk to people. Yes, we have scared entire generations from being able to speak to other people and relying on text. It's hard to get passed the fear but if you are comfortable your likely not moving forward. So to move forward asking questions is the best way, to improve thing you have to be willing to do what makes you uncomfortable.

7. Use what you have- Yes, make the best of what you have. If all you have is two hands, use them. If you are only confident at talking, use your voice. There are millions of ways to make your life better. Be willing to try.

8. Fail- I don't like this one either and I've become great at it. Millions of times I have failed. Do you want a list? I've tried different kinds of job, selling things, home parties, blogging, art, gardening and cooking to list a few. I will list most of these things on the things that didn't fail because I didn't give up. More importantly I learned from each one. What works, doesn't work, what I do like, what I don't like.

9. How to let go- It move forward sometimes you have to let go of things, people or even your preconceived notions. You can't live abundantly if your hung up on these things. 

10. Be yourself- You are here for a reason. If you act different from what you are here to be, not only are you missing out, so are the people around you. The world is boring when we all act alike. This does'nt mean be self centered. It means be authentic. Be real. 

Time for us all to look for the things that make us abundant and use them to our advantage. I'll share things that have worked for me and hope that it will inspire you to move forward and do things that will make your life prosper in ways you'd never imagine. 

I pray God's abundances to you, my friend.

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